Because I like to laugh

"Squawks" are problem listings that pilots generally leave for maintenance crews to fix before the next flight. Here are some squawks submitted by US Air Force pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews.

(P)=PROBLEM (S)=SOLUTION

(P) Left inside main tire almost needs replacement
(S) Almost replaced left inside main tire

(P) Test flight OK, except autoland very rough
(S) Autoland not installed on this aircraft

(P) #2 Propeller seeping prop fluid
(S) #2 Propeller seepage normal - #1, #3 and #4 propellers lack normal seepage

(P) Something loose in cockpit
(S) Something tightened in cockpit

(P) Evidence of leak on right main landing gear
(S) Evidence removed

(P) DME volume unbelievably loud
(S) Volume set to more believable level

(P) Dead bugs on windshield
(S) Live bugs on order

(P) Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent
(S) Cannot reproduce problem on ground

(P) IFF inoperative
(S) IFF always inoperative in OFF mode (IFF-Identification Friend or Foe)

(P) Suspected crack in windshield
(S) Suspect you’re right

(P) Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick
(S) That's what they're there for

(P) Number three engine missing
(S) Engine found on right wing after brief search

(P) Aircraft handles funny
(S) Aircraft warned to straighten up, "fly right" and be serious

(P) Target Radar hums
(S) Reprogrammed Target Radar with the lyrics

(P) Mouse in cockpit
(S) Cat installed

Please, don't do it

Don't make the Pittsburgh Steelers the favorites to win the Super Bowl. They've been the underdogs this long, and it's working for them. And since they get to choose what jersey they want to wear, they should stick with their road jerseys.

But I am giddy. Yes, yesterday, decked out in my Jerome Bettis jersey, I was cheering the Steelers win over the Broncos. Who'da thunk it? The first #6 seed to knock off a #3, #1, and #2 seeded teams on the way to a Super Bowl. Yep. Giddy is the word for it.

I hate being sick, though. I was sick all weekend. Didn't help that I went out in the field on Thursday for work. I only made it 2 hours at work. Had to go back home to bed. Spent a lot of time in bed. It's no fun being sick by yourself, either. Mom was home alone sick, too, so I went to keep her company. Two days of being home and just sleeping or staring at the wall was beginning to drive me crazy. Gotta thank my brother for giving me his cold.

And for the record, I'm picking the "One-for-the-Thumb" over the "First-in-Franchise-History". :-) Go Stillers!